The Whale that got Beached in the Backseat
by Ngagagar
Summary: The newest Harry Potter adventure, could this be what happens in the 7th book? maybe, probably not. R
1. First Tail

**I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters.**

**The Whale that got Beached in the Backseat**

The end of book six

Harry Potter and Ron Weasel are heading home after Dumblebums funeral.

They take the flying car (what else would they take)

"Ready to go home?" Ron tenderly asked Harry as they headed towards the forbidden forest to find there transport. Of course Harry and Ron couldn't get the train because it was not yet the end of the school year (and they are too good for public transport).

It was decided that since Harry and Ron were going to be drop outs they could find there own way home, so were are going to drive in the magic flying car to Ron's house "The Burrow"

"Yes" Harry mumbled

"Are you okay?" Ron looked at Harry with a mother hen expression on his face.

"Yes" Harry re-mumbled

As they stepped into the car they took one long last look at the forest that they had so many great adventures in and remembered how they never got punished for any of them. They had no idea when, if ever, they would be returning to Hogwarts and the forbidden forest. The place that had been home for some of the most important years and events of there live. A home that they had spent more time in than there real home with there parents, when would they ever see it again, it ripped Harry's heart half out to think of leaving home forever. And if he was to return all the teachers would probably be dead or incontinent, it would be like his parents dyeing all over again (he felt the teachers were almost his real parents as he had spent more time with them than with his real dead biological parents).

"Toot toot" the car said and off they flew.

The journey started off uneventful enough. It was a fine day so there wasn't even too much turbulence; that is, not until later. The lack of clouds could be seen as a negative for someone flying in a car that wants to remain hidden from piggy muggle eyes, but it wasn't a problem. In the years since Harry and Ron last flew the car it had been fixed (well its invisibility/camouflage thing had been fixed anyway; it still occasionally belched a black puff of smoke) apart from the smoke it could not be seen.

"What are you going to do when you get home?" Ron cheerfully inquired to Harry.

"Why are you so happy?"

"Why shouldn't I be? It's a lovely day, we never have to go back to school, no more lessons or exams and I get to spend the next few hours with my best buddy"

Harry glared at Ron

"Oh, right, Dumbledoor" Ron realized "I forgot about that"

"HOW CAN YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN, WE LEFT THE FUNERAL LIKE 2 MINUTES AGO" Harry shouted

"Blimey Harry what are you so upset about? You know I have red hair and that it sometimes affects my brain"

Harry seethed "stupid Ron, you're an idiot" he thought to himself.

"What is wrong with you today Ron, you are acting way out of character"

"This is just how I deal with death; you're not exactly acting like yourself either Harry"

"YES I AM" Harry defensively screeched

Ron looked at Harry as if to say "I rest my case"

This look was the last straw for the already distraught Harry; he leapt into the back seat to sulk. He didn't want to hear another word from Ron, or even see his face; the smell he emitted at regular intervals was quite enough for Harry to remember his presence in the car.

But Harry didn't suspect that this was not an ordinary car, it was a magic car. It wasn't a wise move to go and sulk in the back seat. You never know what might happen in a magic car.

_AN: How can Harry not suspect that it's a magic car when it's flying?_


	2. Second Fin

**Second Fin**

The next hour or so in the magic car passed relatively uneventfully. Ron hit a seagull and had to use the windscreen wipers to get its mashed carcass off the front windscreen despite Harry's mumbles that he didn't need to be able to see out the windscreen very well as there was nothing to crash into in the middle of the sky. But Harry was soon proved wrong as they narrowly missed hitting a jumbo jet as they were arguing about the bird. A red streak remained on the windscreen as Harry continued to sulk and resolutely refused to talk any more.

They were soon flying over the ocean as Ron had a very poor sense of direction but at the same time was convinced that flying over to Ireland and then back to England would be the fastest way home as it avoided a fight with any death-eaters, death-vomiters, death-pooers, or any other sort of death-thing. Also the dementors could not go near Ireland because they could not stand the _luck of the Irish._ Voldefart would not go anywhere without backup as he was a chicken brain in Rons opinion (Harry argued that he was more of a Turkey-brain fish-breath burn-victim-no-nose).

So they silently flew across the ocean, when suddenly there was a bang and a jolt, the car felt like it fell down a step.

Ron looked around out the windows, startled, looking for the cause of the sudden turbulence. But there was nothing, and everything had seemed to go back to how it was, no more turbulence appeared.

"Did you feel that?" Ron enquired of Harry without turning his head as when he so much as looked at him before he almost had his head blown up with a _heado-bombo _spell.

No response.

"Fine Harry, act like a child!" Ron grouched; he shouldn't really have been sour about Harry's childish behaviour as Ron himself had acted like a right spoilt brat numerous times in the past.

Then coincidentally Ron looked around at Harry, but to his utter amazement, shock, bereavement, and horror it was not Harry he found himself looking at.

It was a whale.

A huge, glorious, ocean going whale. It just sat there, where Harry used to be, slowly waving its tail which stuck out the side of the car despite the spells Ron's dad had put on the car to make it bigger on the inside (remember it put a spell on it so the entire family could fit in or something).


End file.
